A Treatise on Narcissism

Understanding and dealing with the motives and tactics of the sociopaths and psychopaths around us.

1. Introduction

This essay is an attempt to collate all information — gained from years of experience with these dangerous and destructive parasites — under one heading.

The official definitions for all these Cluster B disorders can be seen at Narcissistic Personality Disorder, Borderline Personality Disorder, Histrionic Personality Disorder and Antisocial Personality Disorder.

But as many of the below experts have noted, the boundaries between these disorders can be blurry.

2. Definition

At the very outset, it's necessary to understand that there are only two types of people; constructive and destructive.

Scientologists actually have a slightly better terminology for this subject, calling these people social or anti-social; and calling the phenomenon suppression.

They also have a lot of good information on the subject, but even they seem to miss the more dangerous aspects of the phenomenon; which will be covered here.

2a. Narcissism is Destruction

Most people don't understand what narcissism really is, and think of it as some kind of excessive self-love.

One has to remember that the end of the story of Narcissus, is destruction.

Narcissists are initially destructive to those around them, and finally to themselves; once everyone else has left them.

This is technically known as a narcissistic collapse.

3. Degrees

When we speak of Narcissism here, we're not talking about the garden-variety narcissist you find everywhere.

Almost everyone in society today has some degree of narcissism. But with most, their abilities and opportunity to do damage are limited.

3a. The Dark Triad

There are three different aspects to this pathology, and they can be present in varying degrees in each individual. 

The first is entitlement, where they believe they have the right to control or even use someone else. The second is manipulation, where the person uses a high degree of intelligence to fulfill that entitlement. The third is malignancy, where the level of entitlement and exploitation is so high that the person actually enjoys causing harm to others; or believes it's their right to do so.

Narcissists can be entitled without being manipulative, or be manipulative without being overly entitled, or be both entitled and exploitative without being malignant.

These three traits coincide somewhat with the famed Dark Triad in formal psychology — Narcissism, Machiavellianism, and Psychopathy. Narcissism could be seen as entitlement, Machiavellianism as manipulation, and Psychopathy as malignancy.

3b. Sociopaths and Psychopaths

The type of narcissists we are discussing here are the actual malignant varieties, sociopaths and psychopaths. 

People with the intelligence, resources and opportunity to do significant damage; if they are allowed to.

3c. NPD vs ASPD

Though the terms are used interchangeably, even in this article, one important distinction between Narcissists and Psychopaths is their drive.

Narcissists are ego-driven and everything they do is to prop up their internal false self. These people essentially have what we used to call an inferiority complex as children, but have developed very complex coping strategies to deal with it. This is one of the reason Narcissists can never apologize, as they see that as a sign of weakness or defeat.

Psychopaths have no problem apologizing or saying whatever is expedient at the moment to advance their agenda. They are too intelligent to be hampered by minor drawbacks such as what others think of them, and have far more complex coping strategies to deal with their complexes. Their only interest therefore is how the their target can be made to do their bidding, and they have no problem saying or doing whatever it takes towards that end.

4. Their Superpower

The superpower of the narcissist is your ignorance, their camouflage, and their ability to manipulate you.

4a. Your Ignorance

The weapons of narcissism are not physical, and the narcissist is deeply aware of how communication can be weaponized.

So their ability to do harm relies entirely on your not understanding what's happening, and them not being seen for what they really are.

4b. Knowledge is Defense

There is a somewhat magical aspect to deception, as it operates on a completely incorporeal plane.

Many of the stories of vampires — and other such parasitic supernatural entities — in the past, may have been based on a limited understanding of how narcissism works.

But anyone who has experienced a deep exposure to a narcissist is undoubtedly aware of their corporeal effects; and how their targets can be drained of even their physical strength.

Here's Jordan Peterson explaining the topic in more detail.

4c. PTSD

Sometimes called Narcissistic Abuse Victim Syndrome (NAVS) in this context, Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder is one of the most severe examples of a physical effect of such an incorporeal attack.

PTSD is usually not a physical shock, but a psychological shock in which a person has their most fundamental beliefs fall apart. 

This usually happens in cases of extreme betrayal, which can be either personal or systemic; such as in wars or litigation. 

Extreme cases of PTSD can cause actual cerebral contusions. One of the ways to overcome such PTSD, is to understand the narcissist for what it is.

4d. A Camouflaged Parasite

Narcissists are powerless once you understand what they truly are, and the various tactics they use.

It's important to not let them know you're on to them though. They will not change, but their tactics will.

5. Morality

Just as in physical aggression, it's OK to use covert aggression in self-defense.

It's OK to manipulate a manipulator, but only once they have been clearly identified.

Narcissists are also more susceptible than usual to the more advanced forms of manipulation, since they rely on a lot of guesswork and deception themselves.

But that is a dangerous road to go down, and may only be possible for a higher-order narcissist.

6. Understanding Them

For a normal healthy human being, it can be difficult to understand how sick the narcissist truly is; and to what extent they will go.

6a. From Religion

In the Abrahamic religious texts, there is a section where God asks Adam why he disobeyed; and Adam replies that the serpent swore on God himself that he was telling the truth.

Many of these religious texts have deep metaphorical or allegorical lessons, but that is a much deeper topic for another day.

6b. Extreme Deception

These are people who have decided very early in life that they want to succeed by manipulating others, and absolutely all means are justified towards that end.

Narcissists can effortlessly swear on their families or on God, pretend to be truthful or noble their entire lives, and can even get into positions that assert these attributes as being their undeniable natures.

6c. Status Seeking

These people are inherently status seeking in nature, and will actively seek out legal or social positions in which they can hide better and have power over others.

6d. Incomplete Weaning

Though narcissists are often portrayed as past victims themselves, this is likely another part of the deception strategy. 

There may also be a vested interest in officially portraying potential clients in a more sympathetic light, but that's not relevant here.

The truth may be that narcissists are simply adults who were pampered too much as children and incompletely weaned. 

This is possibly why their entitlement and boundary violations can take such incredible proportions. The belief that they have the right to take anything they want is deeply rooted in their subconscious. 

They will actually view your protection of your boundary as a violation of their right to abuse you, and to take what they want from you.

This connection between improper weaning and destructive / criminal behavior was quite well-known in the past, and is even mentioned in fictional works such as The Hound of the Baskervilles.

The practices of Initiation and Hazing in certain primitive — and even modern — cultures may have been a form of completing this weaning process; a breaking-in of the individual so they are able to live as a well-integrated part of the environment.

Actual victims of abuse are much more likely to exhibit signs of Borderline Personality Disorder (BPD), such as anger and impulsivity, rather than the symptoms of narcissism. Though the two disorders may look superficially alike, like a footprint compared to the actual foot, they are usually polar opposites; with one being the cause of the other.

This may also explain why the prognosis for BPD is usually much better than for NPD. People with BPD usually want to get better, and so they do; when given the time and support.

6e. Envy

There is some evidence to the fact that at the core of the narcissistic disorder is deep-rooted and repressed jealousy.

While this may not always be obvious at a superficial level, it actually gives a lot of insight into their peculiar behavior.

One of the most obvious signs of this repressed jealousy is their constant need to look important and suppress others, or to feel important by hurting others.

Oddly enough, one of the sources who pointed out the connection between over-socialization and narcissism was the Unabomber, in his infamous manifesto which isn't even being considered all that extreme anymore.

He however refers to the phenomenon as leftism instead of narcissism, but does specifically mention the feelings of inferiority associated with envy.

It appears that the excessive need to observe and conform that comes from over-socialization leads naturally to a lack of original thinking, despite those in this echo chamber constantly telling each other how smart they are.

This is turn leads to an inability to rise above the crowd, and a deep-rooted envy of those who do; with the accompanying shared desire to bring down such outliers by any and all means.

This is also the reason narcissists can be convinced to support absurd ideologies which have no connection to reality whatsoever.

Narcissism also appears to be connected to nominalism and the inability to think abstractly.

While narcissists often refer to themselves as realists for being fixated on physical appearances, it's the ability to think abstractly and beyond appearances that is true realism.

6f. Addiction

The most likely explanation though, is that narcissism is caused by a combination of the above two phenomenon.

The addiction to feeling important / getting one's way (narcissism) and dominating others (ASPD) comes from being pampered during childhood.

But the drive to feed that addiction by any means necessary (Machiavellism) comes during adulthood, from the envy of one's peers.

The modern world appears to contribute to both these causes; firstly by removing the struggle for survival which allows for the pampering, and secondly by the creation of the enormous wealth and resources that lead to the envy.

Note that not even the lower classes would be exempt from this explanation, as most modern urban poverty is relative and not really a struggle for survival.

The driving force would in fact be greater in such cases.

Note that this would explain the tendency of narcissists to fight tooth and nail to protect their false selves from any contradictory data, and why they see others protecting their boundaries as a violation of their own rights. This is akin to separating an addict from his addictive substance.

This would also explain why there tends to be a slightly higher tendency for narcissism within urban populations as well.

In essence, narcissism can be seen as a mechanism of reality to keep its own excesses within limits. The unrealistic expectations of the narcissist can only be met by the manipulative sociopath, or the simp who is perhaps just a sociopath in disguise.

7. Identifying Them

Since camouflage is one of the most important tools of the narcissists, the first step to deal with these parasites is to be able to clearly identify them.

7a. Testing

While it's always a good idea to observe people's actions rather than simply believe what they're saying, deliberately testing someone sometimes has a manipulative aspect to it.

Rather than testing for genuineness, Narcissists will usually test how far they can violate boundaries; and this is one of the first ways to identify them.

As with most things, this too comes down to intentions. Testing is manipulative when done with no potential mutual benefit, and when the tests have the potential to harm the target.

But observing and ethically testing may also be one of the surest ways to identify a narcissist. An example could be to see whether a person who claims to be a well-wisher is actually willing to lend a listening ear or a helping hand.

7b. Charm

Sociopaths and psychopaths are often among the most charming people one ever meets.

Their entire existence depends on manipulation, and they can spend decades learning the techniques that will attract and attach their targets to them.

Due to their willingness to be as deceptive as required to further their goals, they have absolutely no problem saying or doing whatever it takes to attract and ensnare their targets.

Narcissists are among the most warm and entertaining people one encounters, at least in the love-bombing or affection-bombing phase.

7c. Irritation

One of the clearest signs of narcissism is that while narcissists will constantly talk about and expect help for their own problems, even the slightest mention of your problems will lead to irritation and dismissal.

This usually gives the first glimpse of their true natures, extreme entitlement for themselves and a complete lack of empathy for anyone else.

But they know they have to pretend to care, for people to trust them; and that pretense takes effort.

So when you actually start expecting support for your own issues, the fatigue of pretense and the resulting irritation starts to show.

7d. Status Pronouncements

Declarations of idealism or honesty — or constant reliance on designations, uniforms, social positions, priesthood, parenthood, poverty, old age etc — should all be investigated with extreme care. 

Narcissists very commonly invent illnesses for themselves, and can often pretend to be weaker or dumber or older or more immature than they actually are (see section on sympathy and guilt).

7e. Victimhood Narratives

Real victims are often too traumatized and ashamed of their victimhood to talk about it, and will even pretend to be tougher than they actually are.

Anyone with a constant victimhood narrative should therefore be observed very carefully.

7f. Projection

One of the things that makes narcissists difficult to identify is how well they are able to imitate their victims. 

Human beings also have a tendency to see things as they themselves are. So good people often see good where it's nonexistent, and narcissists see only other parasites or potential hosts. There's no middle ground.

Due to their extreme entitlement, narcissists may also genuinely believe themselves to be victims when they were actually the perpetrators.

Identification therefore requires long and careful observation. Listening to their version of the story will only confuse things further. 

8. Tactics

8a. Love-Bombing

This can also take the form of affection-bombing in non-romantic relationships, with sometimes glaringly absurd declarations of being soulmates or best friends.

This is sometimes called idealization and may sometimes happen with non-narcissists or even with narcissism victims, who may immaturely idealize another person.

But narcissistic idealization is insincere, deliberate and sustained; with the definite goal of keeping the target on a serotonin and dopamine high.

In purely chemical terms, this is the most powerful form of addiction; and has withdrawal symptoms very similar to substance addiction when the abrupt narcissistic discard happens.

All this is calculated and planned to control or to destroy the target; as required.

8b. Future-Faking

Often an elaborate form of gaslighting, the narcissist consistently portrays a perfect future to keep the target hooked.

This too is part of the idealization and love-bombing strategy to ensnare the target.

A less elaborate version of this is called breadcrumbing, where the narcissist simply drops enough emotional crumbs to keep a target from losing interest. 

8c. Attrition

Often known as Chinese Salami, the weapon of attrition is based on slowly wearing the target down; with repeated attacks and suggestions.

8d. Boundary Violation

These attacks will often take the form of careful and repeated violations of a person's private life, or even physical boundaries.

These will usually be disguised as well-intended or playful, for plausible deniability. 

8e. Triangulation

Another common form of manipulation is comparison with another, or pitting two targets against each other.

This often takes the form of the good-cop-bad-cop routine, with the narcissist playing the good cop and portraying the third person as the bad cop to both the targets.

8f. Reactive Abuse

More commonly known as baiting, the narcissist will often switch from passive boundary violation to aggressive abuse to get a reaction out of their target.

The reaction will then be highlighted to further the goals of the narcissist, while the initial abuse that caused the reaction will be completely downplayed.

8g. Plausible Deniability

For many of these tactics to work, they have to be carefully disguised as jokes or as altruistic. 

The narcissist has usually spent decades practicing these techniques on various targets, sometimes simply as an experiment or form of study. 

Not all narcissistic attacks are goal-oriented. It's often just practice. 

8h. Emotional Rollercoaster

One of the primary goals of the narcissist is to keep their targets in an emotional state of mind.

A target that starts thinking clearly or acting logically will soon escape; or worse, expose the narcissist.

8i. Self-Abasement 

Praising the target and downplaying one's own intelligence or strength is a common tactic to get the target to do one's bidding. 

But this can be interspersed with criticism, negging and triangulation when required.

The constant variations have the added advantage of keeping the target emotional and confused.

Tactics are carefully evaluated and tested to inflict maximum damage. A tall person will not be criticized on height, but perhaps on weight etc.

8j. Gaslighting

This is another oft-misunderstood technique which most people assume is just lying. 

But actual gaslighting is often a long-term strategy of deliberately creating a false reality for the target, to keep them under control.

This can take the form of creating a false soulmate narrative for romantic partners; or constantly changing even the most basic facts around the target to keep them confused, and make them doubt their own sanity and memory.

An important note on Gaslighting, is that it has its roots in childhood. Only people who have been gaslit as children, usually by their parents, are susceptible to Gaslighting.

Another important point about gaslighting is that it is often an extreme form of manipulation, only done by those with serious personality disorders.

The willingness to intentionally and dishonestly disturb someone else's mental state is indicative of a highly disturbed individual, who for whatever reason believes themselves to be justified in anything they do.

Such an individual usually also believes themselves to be beyond reproach, and will obviously deny all accusations. Exhortations to come clean will fall on deaf years as that would mean a double loss, one of their fake ideal self and the other of their position of control.

Individuals who openly, deliberately and repeatedly gaslight need to be deal with extreme caution.

8k. Discard

What can seem like sudden and extreme betrayal, this is often the phase when the target first comes to realize that something has gone severely wrong. 

This is also often what leads to PTSD.

Again, the symptoms of the discard are very similar to the withdrawal symptoms of substance addiction. 

An interesting point about the discard is that the victim is rarely told they are being discarded, or that anything has even changed. But there will be an abrupt, drastic and permanent change in the narcissist's behavior; usually with unexplained physical or emotional distancing.

This is usually because the narcissist has clearly exposed themselves in some way, even though their victim may not have realized it yet; and the narcissist knows they now have to be cautious around them.

There may be an occasional hoover to check if the victim has understood what happened, but this is rare. By the time the discard happens, the narcissist has usually extracted whatever they need to from their victim or found an alternative source of supply.

Either way, they have decided that they have no further use for their victim.

Keep in mind that the narcissist views their victims' inability to see through their charades and lies as a sign of stupidity; rather than as a sign of their own sickness in exhibiting these behaviors in the first place.

8l. Hoovering 

The narcissist understands the human need, and possibly even induced addiction, for closure. This need may not always be natural, as real-life issues can often take years and even decades to get resolved.

The narcissist can therefore often continue to hoover the target even after a discard or when the target tries to escape, by sending periodic declarations of love or kinship.

Paradoxically, this hoovering may sometimes be prompted by the narcissist's own need for immediate gratification to do whatever they want when they want; or the need for closure on any doubts about their own fragile sense of superiority. 

The hoovering happens whenever one of the above needs is not met, as in the case of an unusually intelligent and resilient target who simply ignores or blocks the narcissist; or does not give them the usual red-carpet treatment they are used to while walking all over their targets.

These calculated and sometimes frantic intimations from the narcissist will therefore often seem absurd in the given situation, and in their mechanical regularity.

This is because the narcissist does not actually feel empathy or anything else for anyone else, but only imitates those feelings. So once the target has started seeing things unemotionally, many of the actions of the narcissist can look glaringly absurd.

It's a curious paradox that while the narcissist does not see others as humans but only as objects to be possessed, they are somehow able to brilliantly understand the thought process of their targets to manipulate them.

They truly are geniuses at manipulation.

Their only failing is that they don't understand the long-term effects of such manipulation, and that's why they have to keep seeking new sources of supply.

This can often lead to extremes such as regularly moving to new cities.

8m. Smear Campaign

Usually a carefully-worded false narrative of victimhood, the objective of the smear campaign is to bring social pressure to bear on the target and force them to do the bidding of the narcissist.

The people this is aimed at are often referred to as flying monkeys, well-intentioned but clueless people who will do the dirty work of the narcissist for them.

Again, this can be very difficult to fight as few people have the awareness to understand who the real perpetrator is.

Such contacts must usually be assumed to be a lost cause. Trying to convince them or to attack the narcissist only gives the narcissist what they want. 

The narcissist is a master of social manipulation, and any kind of reaction only plays into their strategy.

8n. Sympathy/Guilt

Guilt and Shaming are actually some of the first tactics employed by any narcissist to get someone to do their bidding.

Guilt can consist of either pleas for sympathy, or reminders of past errors; real or perceived, and perhaps completely unrelated.

Advanced techniques for inducing sympathy can be feigning poverty, frailty, illness or immaturity; to induce sympathy in the victim (see section on status pronouncements).

Advanced techniques for inducing guilt in the target can be constant reminders of responsibilities that the target actually has nothing to do with, or of tasks that may be unfairly burdensome to the target; while suppressing the fact that the narcissist was the one who neglected the said tasks in the first place, and behaved in irresponsible ways that have caused the task to come to its current unmanageable state.

The parasitic nature of the narcissist means that they compulsively try to transfer their work and responsibilities to others; no matter how easy it may be for them to do it themselves, or how unfair it may be to their target.

This is part of the entitled false-self of the narcissist where they believe themselves to be superior and work to be beneath them, and that their true calling to be in getting others to work for them.

It may be worth mentioning here that narcissist has usually spent decades building a false-self, a false image of themselves that they will fight tooth and nail to hold on to. This false-self is usually based on some form of false superiority, either in intelligence or looks or strength or social position; and usually has absolutely no correlation with reality. It's the gradual destruction of the false-self that eventually leads to the narcissistic collapse.

But any attempt to expose this false-self will lead to vicious retributions, and should be avoided at all costs.

8o. Shaming/Ridicule

Shaming and ridicule are actually very similar tactics, the only difference between them being that ridicule is usually just shaming disguised as humor or banter.

Ridicule is actually one of the major components of Saul Alinsky's Rules For Radicals; and as Alinsky notes, it is a covert-aggressive attack which is almost impossible to defend against.

While all humor is not necessarily covert-aggressive, shaming and ridicule can be seen very obviously to be attacks when they are instrumental; as in, done with the specific goal of controlling another person.

Good-natured banter can be harmless and enjoyed by everyone, including the person who is the object of the humor.

True covert-aggressive shaming and ridicule have the same basic components.

They are carefully targeted to attack a person's perceived weaknesses, they attack the person's character rather the subject under discussion (often referred to as Ad Hominem), they are usually unrelated to the actual subject under discussion which may be troublesome for the narcissist, and they are carefully disguised to be look sympathetic or humorous.

One may also encounter a condescending tone or sly smile, where the social situation makes open ridicule difficult. These people essentially have a highly developed feeling of their own inferiority, warranted or not, and suppress it by thus constantly and covertly attacking everything around them.

8p. Word Salad

Anyone who has tried to argue with a narcissist should be well acquainted with this tactic.

A constant stream of gas-lighting, shifting of goal-posts, plausibly deniable changing of facts, and other disingenuous verbal gymnastics; the Word-Salad will have you not only forgetting what the argument was initially even about, but even your own name or where you were.

8q. Leveling

This is a very common tactic mentioned by multiple psychologists as happening even between their own clients and them, that either involves the narcissist building themselves up or bringing their (who they view as) opponents down.

The narcissist essentially cannot stand to see anyone look better than them in any way. So whenever someone does or says anything that may remind the narcissist of their diminutive (mental) stature, whether about themselves or someone else, the narcissist will try several things to bring down the person who is making them feel small.

This could be insulting the person, or cracking jokes at their expense, or simply stonewalling them.

In fact, this tactic — more than anything else — gives a deep insight into the repressed jealousy and fragile ego of the narcissist.

9. Solutions

It can often be difficult to clearly identify a narcissist as they are masters of camouflage, manipulation and plausible deniability.

One of their clearest giveaways is a parasitic nature. The other is damage to those around them, often in the form of autoimmune disorders.

Wanting to get away from a narcissist is a healthy response to such a situation.

Wanting revenge or to turn tables on the narcissist, or to continue long-term association even after clear warnings, are all signs that the so-called target is also narcissistic; or perhaps even the real narcissist, and only projecting their own narcissism onto their victims.

Projection is also one of the biggest problems with identifying a narcissist, as most narcissists see others as narcissists and themselves as empaths. In narcissism documentaries, it's quite common to see people seemingly talk about each other while both referring to the other as the narcissists.

The only real way to clearly identify a real narcissist therefore, is the narcissistic collapse; slow destruction over the long-term, sometimes over a period of decades.

So it's not recommended that one wait around to clearly identify the narcissist. They will get their just desserts, if that's what they truly deserve. One should instead focus on oneself instead.

9a. No-Contact

For real victims, the options are quite clear.

The best solution to deal with any malignant narcissist is to go full no-contact. 

These people have spent their entire lives learning to manipulate and use others. Your odds of beating them are slim to none. 

Blocking people is usually considered immature, and that may actually be the case when someone is doing it very often.

But in extreme cases and when dealing with a truly pathological or character-disturbed individual, it really is the most logical response. 

After all, remember what the religious texts say. It's always best to stay away from these people and let them deal with each other.

9b. Gray Rock

If no-contact is not an option, as in with family members etc, then you have to gray rock. As in, become completely nonreactive.

But learning to do that successfully requires understanding what's going on, very clearly.

The narcissist will guess what's happening as well, and will continue to test newer attacks and to violate boundaries.

This is a never-ending struggle, and must be avoided if possible. Dr Phil explains it well below (the man may be a celebrity, but is also a highly-qualified PhD psychologist).

9c. Brace for Impact

Narcissists understand that all their power resides in getting you to engage with them, and that cutting contact is a virtual death sentence to all their power and their schemes. So be prepared for every single possible attack — the good and the bad and the ugly as they say — to get you to engage back with them.

While some of the methods may look harmless, such as random messages, the tactics will get more and more ugly and aggressive as time goes on.

Insigating fights, paradoxically, is one of the most common ways that the narcisisst will try to get you back in their control. This is a form of the reactive abuse described above, and is explained well by Dr Ross in the following videos.

9d. Counseling

While No-Contact and Gray Rock are the only real solutions to dealing with Narcissism, it may be difficult to achieve that by oneself.

Understanding Narcissism for the first time often requires a paradigm shift in one's thinking, as the people who experience the more extreme forms of Narcissism are those who have been gaslit from childhood to accept — and even be drawn to — such behavior.

Talking to someone may therefore be the first and most essential step to be able clearly understand this very complex phenomenon.

This usually takes the form of talking to a counselor. But there are several horror stories of Narcissistic counselors bringing their own agendas or issues into these interactions and thus causing more harm than good.

The best option may therefore be talking to someone within one's own social circle who is interested in listening, helping and learning. The above risk is there in this scenario as well, especially because of the childhood gaslighting, but perhaps to a lesser degree.

Such personal communication is also not limited by financial constraints, and protects the victim from possibility of being taken advantage of financially; in their already weakened and vulnerable state.

Something we often forget in our modern nuclear lifestyle is that we evolved as social animals. Just talking to someone you can trust can help, a lot.

In fact, the entire profession of counseling may be based on this very basic human need.

10. Conclusion

Formal psychology is quite outdated, and still based on theories from the repressive era. The modern problem is not one of repression, but unbridled expression.

Also, formal psychology often confuses defensive denial with offensive dishonesty. Most antisocial denial is not defensive, but extremely offensive and aggressive in nature.

Humans are also the only known species to display this type of intra-species predatory behaviour.

These topics are explored in more detail by Dr. George Simon below, and in his other videos.

Much of the official literature on narcissism is conflicting, and there are many differences of opinion between professionals in the field on exact definitions and patterns etc.

The information given here may therefore conflict with some official definitions, but is based on decades of actual experience with the most extreme forms of this phenomenon.

Psychopathy is probably a more accurate term for this phenomenon, as this is an actual pathology of the psyche. Sociopathy, NPD, ASPD, narcissism etc are simply more politically-correct terms used today.

Perhaps the simplest way to look at narcissists is as evil geniuses in the short-term, but severely intellectually-impaired in the long-term. Please see the Daniel Kahneman interview below for a deeper understanding of this topic.

Their biggest failing is not being able to understand that they cannot manipulate people like they do objects, because their targets have intelligence as well and their actions will eventually have severe long-term repercussions.

They are psychological parasites who are a danger to everyone around them. As long as they have access to a host, their behavior will continue unchanged.

Understand the behavior, identify the patterns, and stay out of their reach.

‘[Man] obliged therefore to endeavour to interest them in his situation, and to make them find, either in reality or in appearance, their advantage in labouring for his. It is this which renders him false and artificial with some, imperious and unfeeling with others, and lays him under a necessity of deceiving all those for whom he has occasion, when he cannot terrify them, and does not find it for his interest to serve them in reality. To conclude, an insatiable ambition, an ardor to raise his relative fortune, not so much from any real necessity, as to set himself above others, inspires all men with a direful propensity to hurt one another; with a secret jealousy, so much the more dangerous, as to strike its blow more surely, it often assumes the mask of good will; in short, with concurrence and rivalship on one side; on the other, with opposition of interest; and always with the concealed desire of making profit at the expence of some other person: All these evils are the first effects of property, and the inseparable attendants of beginning inequality.’

― Rousseau

'Why do you weep?' the goddesses asked.

'I weep for Narcissus," the lake replied.

'Ah, it is no surprise that you weep for Narcissus,' they said, 'for though we always pursued him in the forest, you alone could contemplate his beauty close at hand.'

'But... was Narcissus beautiful?' the lake asked.

'Who better than you to know that?' the goddesses asked in wonder. 'After all, it was by your banks that he knelt each day to contemplate himself!'

The lake was silent for some time. Finally, it said:

'I weep for Narcissus, but I never noticed that Narcissus was beautiful. I weep because, each time he knelt beside my banks, I could see, in the depths of his eyes, my own beauty reflected.'

'What a lovely story,' the alchemist thought.”

― Paulo Coelho, The Alchemist